Quarter life crisis: I swear, it’s a thing
Two months ago: I hit a point where I still felt happy but something BIG was missing. I could not quite put my finger on it.
For those of you who don’t know me personally, I’m Victoria (Belle). The younger sister of Eliza & Belle. My hobbies include trying new coffee shops, taking pretty pictures, (slowly) fixing up our home, organizing everything and anything, and picking out the perfect outfit for whatever occasion comes up! (Otherwise I’m in sweat pants or yoga pants) I would say my strengths include encouraging others, living in the moment, and taking on anything life throws my way! If I could eat one thing for the rest of my life it was be Penang Curry. YEP.
What brought on this crisis:
I was working a job that I was way too comfortable at.
After high school I started at a local bank picking up hours to get myself through college. I made friends there and I didn’t feel the need move on once graduation hit. During my time at the bank I started traveling for the auto show as a Jeep narrator. I truly loved the place I was at in life. When I was home, I was in the office and when I was traveling I was making life-long friends and teaching the country about the latest automobiles. BADASS. I would get on stage, pick up that microphone and deliver a speech that made my heart truly believe in the product. I was SO happy.
After I married Andrew in 2017 my plan was to leave the bank and begin chasing my dreams of Eliza & Belle by using the auto show money to fund this business. OUR OWN BUSINESSS! I was going to work a couple shows a month and spend all my extra time ON building our brand. Right when I put my notice in to the bank we found out we were expecting sweet, Enzo. Our honeymoon miracle! (That’s a whole other post) After finding out this news Andrew and I agreed it would make more sense for me to stay at the bank. So, I stayed.
Now, I don’t want you to think there was a moment where everything became clear. Because that’s not how my story is truly unfolding. During this time of finding out I was going to be a mother and staying at the bank. I was looking to everyone for help. I was frustrated and angry. I live such a great life; however, I need to live my purpose so I can feel FULFILLED. Countless times I cried to my husband, mom, friends, sister, and honestly anyone else who would listen. My broken voice would explain how I wanted to find my purpose. And I would get so frustrated with not knowing where to start. As a start up we seriously thought we have found a way to get rich quick. We had no idea what we were getting ourselves into. Entrepreneurship is HARD. Owning a business is the most terrifying rollercoaster ride I have ever been on. At one point I told Beth “I don’t even know why we have a boutique, I don’t even like clothes THAT much”. Once again I felt like I didn’t even know what I was doing. I’m beginning to realize it was never about the clothes. Beth encourages me and she says “Get what you want out of what you already have”. There I was, looking at a business we built and I knew this journey was something worth showing up for, every day.
I want to be a female entrepreneur.
A year later, It was a Saturday afternoon and I was at work. I realized: THIS IS NOT ME. That following week I put it my notice in at the bank and took a demotion at another local credit union. Less hours, less money and I didn’t not know if I was going to like it. I had to take the jump. PROS: I get out a couple days a week, I have more time for this business, I have more time for that sweet baby of mine.
I truly believe ALL OF THIS was God, paving a path for me. I know he is showing me what he has in store for me all along. I don’t know about you girls but I have a hard time trusting the path. This journey of change and transformation was not easy for me. And in the process my heart wanted answers. I still am looking for answers. I’m one step closer to finding MY purpose and this is what I was missing all along. I was doing things out of habit. Not intentionally working towards a long term goal.
My note to you: if you are on your own journey trust our maker and know he is good. He LOVES you. He knows your heart. Meditate. Pray. Journal. And ask yourself Deep questions and give yourself deep, detailed explanations. Where do you want to be long term? Focus in on that and inch towards that each day. Lean on your friends and be honest about what you’re going through. I hope this helps someone else and I hope you know you are worthy of the life you dream of. I hope you realize there is not always that moment where you say “Ah Hah!” GOOD Things do not just FALL into your lap immediately. You work towards them. One single step at a time. You can do anything your heart desires and if you want to take a demotion to get you one step closer to your dreams, you my friend, take the leap.